Okay, here are the facts. I'm 20 (just turned a week ago) and my girlfriend is 19, turning 20 in a month or two. We've been dating for 5 months. We're both virgins, by choice, and wondering about sex. We've discussed it alot and we both want to wait a bit longer. She wants to wait until she has financial security, which to me seems like an elaborate excuse because she's afraid. I'm also afraid as it seems like a big step. We've fooled around some and it hasn't changed our relationship much. We still are together almost every day. What I'm looking for is a bit of clarity. I've heard that sex changes a relationship and that scares me. I also have typical guy fears about not being very good and not pleasing her.
Anyone have any ideas/advice/anything helpful?Advice about my current situation?
Yeah, wear a raincoat on your jimmy.Advice about my current situation?
Well your first time is always a little scary, but fun. You'll be fine once you get started and she's not gonna expect you to be a pro in the sack b/c it's both of your first times. I would suggest that she gets on birth control if she's not already. I don't really understand what she means about the financial security part. Poor people have sex all the time. If you use the proper protection you should be fine. I wouldn't try pushing her into it though, and it sounds like she's just not ready. Maybe give her a little while and then just try.
If you love and care about each other enough to wait, why don't you wait until you're married? Virginity is something you only get once, and you don't want to make a mistake. If you're that unsure of a big step, don't take it. If you want a child together, then go ahead, because babies can happen the first time. How can you be worried about pleasing her if she's never done it either. It's not like either one of you knows what to expect.
Here, catch this 2 ton ball I'm throwing! Kidding, just trying to break the tension. Okay, no matter what age you are, you remember all of your firsts, kiss, sex, marriage, baby, whether it was good, bad, downright scary or maybe like me you wanna tap the time fairy for a ';do over!'; Having sex, in my opinion, changes your feelings toward a person, I can't have sex for the fun of it, that's just me and it IS a big step. You've seen them naked, you've heard the sounds, you're laying the most vulnerable parts of yourself out there, you should be scared. By most accounts, women are the ones that attach a serious set of emotions to sex. Some men do too, but in general, women do it more often.
Financial security? Man, while it does sound like an elaborate excuse, she's already tying a big commitment to having sex with you.
Only you and her can decide if you want to take it to the next level and be physically intimate and if you're ready for the feelings that will provoke in each of you should you decide, because it's something you can't take back or do over.
Sex is a natural thing, talk to a few DECENT guys about this, if they are real men, they will help you sort out the in's and out's of it. Good luck!
Not sure I understand the ';financial security'; thing... personally I try to keep sex and money as far apart as possible. I do believe that being a bit afraid is a good thing for you guys. It indicates that you feel sex is an big deal... and frankly it is a big deal.
I don't believe it's a bad deal, but it is a big one. It shouldn't be trivialized or be made to seem like it's nothing. And yes... sex does change a relationship. It can make people closer, and it can push them apart. It can turn friends into partners, or partners into enemies.
I believe you give a little bit of yourself, and accept a little bit of another in the act of making love. Being that open and making yourself that vunerable affects a relationship. You will know more, feel more, be more to each other than you were before. I don'r believe in ';meaningless sex.'; Some people just don't care what kind of meaning they make.
I know this... it shouldn't happen until you both want it to... without reservation, without doubt. Otherwise what it could mean, is someone hurt and ashamed, and a relationship that could soon end.
when your 30 your gonna look back at all the time you wasted waiting around...its only sex...be safe but realize its not gonna change the world.
juzz wait a bit longer...besides u should b sure if u want to do it wit her 4 d 1st time...is should b special...n maybe u guys should talk about it a lil bit more....but take it slow...wait a lil longer :)
Ok.. I'm going to agree with my gal, Suthern Yankee. Financial security is not an excuse, but, REALITY is, you'll never truly be financially secure. Once you have kids, the whole thing changes.
As for sex, unless you want to marry her, you better be careful. You guys are too young. enjoy life. have fun. Travel. GET TO KNOW EACH OTHER!!!! If i could pound one thing home its that. My Gal and I know each other so well we finish each other's sentence. We are comfortable at the movie or in bed and that, my friend, is off the chain.
Let us also talk about this: Does she even WANT children? its a question you need to ask and answer. If you both agree NO, then you need to do some things to make sure it doesn't happen, because, I GUARANTEE, the blame game will happen.
Sex does change a relationship. It skips it to the next level and if you aren't ready to commit, then you better think twice.
As to the not very good or not pleasing her, WHO DOES SHE HAVE TO COMPARE TO?? You are you and she is she and well. that's life...
Slow. Steady.. 5 months???? not near enough time... as i said, get to know each other and ask questions. Life questions not heat of the moment questions.
i think its good youre waiting. but if she says she is ready, go for it. if you prefer to wait a while longer, she will respect that if she loves you. If you say you are ready, but she isnt, respect her by not pressuring her. that is true love. love does not revolve around sex.
You definitally dont have to worry about pleasing her if shes also a virgin. And i really think that you might as well wait. What if you guys end up having sex and then break up soon after, then saving your virginity would all have been for nothing. It is a big step and try not to just get caught in the moment with it.
Saturday, July 31, 2010
Advice about a party please?!?
There's this girl Sarah and it's going to be her birthday next weekend. Me, Natalie and Taylor are throwing Sarah a surprise birthday party. Me and Natalie are very good friends with another girl Madison. However, Natalie and Taylor did not add Madison to the party guest list because she is not friends with Sarah.
Is it rude not to invite Madison...do you think she will be hurt???
I understand that Madison is not friends with Sarah but still...Advice about a party please?!?
in my opinion...
because it is Sarah's birthday party.. i don't think she would like it very much if Madison was there.. and even though you are good friends with both of them, i am sure Madison will understand that it is Sarah's party and that it is Sarah that would not want her there. If you were good friends with Madison.. she will thank you for letting her know and will understand rather than doing it behind her back
if this doesn't help then i am very sorry =P but i tried =)make up
Is it rude not to invite Madison...do you think she will be hurt???
I understand that Madison is not friends with Sarah but still...Advice about a party please?!?
in my opinion...
because it is Sarah's birthday party.. i don't think she would like it very much if Madison was there.. and even though you are good friends with both of them, i am sure Madison will understand that it is Sarah's party and that it is Sarah that would not want her there. If you were good friends with Madison.. she will thank you for letting her know and will understand rather than doing it behind her back
if this doesn't help then i am very sorry =P but i tried =)
Advice about imvu?
hey my friend recently told me about imvu it seems pretty cool but i wanted to get some more views about it before i join. If anyone can help me i just wanna know good and bad points. Thanx i really appreciate itAdvice about imvu?
Its not too bad. They try to sap a lot of money out of you with all the stuff you can buy. Its interesting and fun to play around with, but the actual talking aspect kinda sucks. Once you write something in a bubble, you can't delete it. The bubbles kinda get in the way of eachother, and what you say stays up there for about 5 minutes
I talked to a lot of older people. I'm 19. Half the people I talked to were 20ish and the other half were 40ish, mostly in the UK (I'm in the US)Advice about imvu?
its the best ever im on it EVERY day!!!
I would go to IMVU Help or Agreement and Terms, to get more information.
its a wasit
its fun for about 2 seconds and there are ALOT of kids
i used it when i was 17 and all iw as talking to was 12-14 year olds
ah i depends on yoUr computer because uses graphics rather
than just text but it is more cool/interesting you can c Ur emoticons and get junk for ur avatar.so download it n try it out don't like it install it.:o)
-
It sucks
it`s mostly just kids and old perverts on there, and the chat thing hardly ever works it`s always crashing or freezing your computer and they are always taking stuff away from you.after you buy something like the next day they take it away and say, sorry thats not allowed on imvu.but yeah it`s probably fun for about 2 minutes then it sucks A LOT!
Its not too bad. They try to sap a lot of money out of you with all the stuff you can buy. Its interesting and fun to play around with, but the actual talking aspect kinda sucks. Once you write something in a bubble, you can't delete it. The bubbles kinda get in the way of eachother, and what you say stays up there for about 5 minutes
I talked to a lot of older people. I'm 19. Half the people I talked to were 20ish and the other half were 40ish, mostly in the UK (I'm in the US)Advice about imvu?
its the best ever im on it EVERY day!!!
I would go to IMVU Help or Agreement and Terms, to get more information.
its a wasit
its fun for about 2 seconds and there are ALOT of kids
i used it when i was 17 and all iw as talking to was 12-14 year olds
ah i depends on yoUr computer because uses graphics rather
than just text but it is more cool/interesting you can c Ur emoticons and get junk for ur avatar.so download it n try it out don't like it install it.:o)
-
It sucks
it`s mostly just kids and old perverts on there, and the chat thing hardly ever works it`s always crashing or freezing your computer and they are always taking stuff away from you.after you buy something like the next day they take it away and say, sorry thats not allowed on imvu.but yeah it`s probably fun for about 2 minutes then it sucks A LOT!
Advice about a girl !!!?
i use to be such good friends wtih this girl. i dated her at one time. if it helps for your answer, her name is christina. adn we got into a fight. ya ya ya. and we didnt talk at all. and then i told her that i loved her. eventually we began to be friends. but not much. she didtn like how i smoked weed, which i never should hvae done. but i hung out with her today, adn we were talking just casually. and it seemed like she was alrite talking. but, what i really want is advice on getting back with her, cuz the last thing i want to do is get too far apart from her.Advice about a girl !!!?
stop smoking the weedAdvice about a girl !!!?
you did what u did last time before u guys went out.
and there is nothing wrong with smoking weed,it could be like a hobby,everyone has a hobby just some are in differnt levels.
bleh.
hello!well first of all what you did with the weed was not nice but since u know that ,it's ok,i mean it was a one time thing...now about christina i don't know why you got into a fight for,i mean it was a serious reason or it was just a stupi regular fight..?anyway seems like you got over that fact...as you said you are ok now but you are not that close.firstly try to get close to her again and remind her good memories of you too together in the past.approach her in the way you feel,i mean don't pretend you see her like a friend when you love her except if you do want her to be your friend.Either way i'm sure you want her to be a part of your life so you need to get her back and then will see about what she feels about you..cuz either way again she will love you either as a friend or sth more than that...let me know what happened...!!!good luck!!!
win her heart,stop smoking,b urself n remember express ur luv again n again only if ur sure she is not gonna break da frndship
Just keep asking her to go do stuff with you. Build a history and be trustworthy and fun. Make her feel like she is a better person when she is around you. Always try to be your best self when you are with her.
Is her name was christiena_jasmine
i dont think i would like going out w/ a guy smoking weed. try and quit, maybe she'll come back if she found out u quit for her.
Sometimes it takes awhile for people to get over a fight and to learn how to trust again. Not talking after the fight could have lead to her feeling either rejected or she just did not want to talk because she feared that there would be another fight coming up. Of course, she could have just been that angry about the whole situation. It also sounds like smoking weed around her made her feel really uncomfortable and unsure of you. Perhaps talking with her and telling her you won't smoke around her ever again would help the situation. Just keep talking and see where it goes. At least she is still talking with you and that's good! Do not push her about having a relationship because that may freak her out. Keep it friendly and chill atm. Good luck.
try and come of weed if u can mate that will make her come back say you did it for her comfort her and make her feel wanted make her feel special
hope i helped
Many girls don't like it if her boy has any bad habits.
So just stop smoking weed and it can do wonders for your own health too not now but later.
So if you want her to be with you stop smoking
Good luck =)
stop smokin weed then tell her you stopped
stop smoking the weedAdvice about a girl !!!?
you did what u did last time before u guys went out.
and there is nothing wrong with smoking weed,it could be like a hobby,everyone has a hobby just some are in differnt levels.
bleh.
hello!well first of all what you did with the weed was not nice but since u know that ,it's ok,i mean it was a one time thing...now about christina i don't know why you got into a fight for,i mean it was a serious reason or it was just a stupi regular fight..?anyway seems like you got over that fact...as you said you are ok now but you are not that close.firstly try to get close to her again and remind her good memories of you too together in the past.approach her in the way you feel,i mean don't pretend you see her like a friend when you love her except if you do want her to be your friend.Either way i'm sure you want her to be a part of your life so you need to get her back and then will see about what she feels about you..cuz either way again she will love you either as a friend or sth more than that...let me know what happened...!!!good luck!!!
win her heart,stop smoking,b urself n remember express ur luv again n again only if ur sure she is not gonna break da frndship
Just keep asking her to go do stuff with you. Build a history and be trustworthy and fun. Make her feel like she is a better person when she is around you. Always try to be your best self when you are with her.
Is her name was christiena_jasmine
i dont think i would like going out w/ a guy smoking weed. try and quit, maybe she'll come back if she found out u quit for her.
Sometimes it takes awhile for people to get over a fight and to learn how to trust again. Not talking after the fight could have lead to her feeling either rejected or she just did not want to talk because she feared that there would be another fight coming up. Of course, she could have just been that angry about the whole situation. It also sounds like smoking weed around her made her feel really uncomfortable and unsure of you. Perhaps talking with her and telling her you won't smoke around her ever again would help the situation. Just keep talking and see where it goes. At least she is still talking with you and that's good! Do not push her about having a relationship because that may freak her out. Keep it friendly and chill atm. Good luck.
try and come of weed if u can mate that will make her come back say you did it for her comfort her and make her feel wanted make her feel special
hope i helped
Many girls don't like it if her boy has any bad habits.
So just stop smoking weed and it can do wonders for your own health too not now but later.
So if you want her to be with you stop smoking
Good luck =)
stop smokin weed then tell her you stopped
Advice about gf's mom?
ok so my gf and i just got together after about 3 months apart. her moms bitchin was the original reason we split the first place. the reason her mom is bitchin so much is b/c she found out i have a pretty bad past. i have done drugs and been arrested twice. since then i have comletely changed my life i quit drinkin and have been off drugs for well over 2yrs. i go to church and have become very active there. my life is so much better w/ out all that other junk of my past life. so ne ways my gf is 18 soon to be 19 and i have just turned 22. i personaly believe that she should be able to see who she wishes to see, but her mom dosent quite see it that way. her mom makes her life a living hell when she even mentions my name, let alone tells her we are back together.so the question is: how can i get in her moms good graces, so that she will approve of her daughter seein me. thank u for ur time and God bless u all.Advice about gf's mom?
It is a tough one. I was in a similar situation, where I was a compulsive gambler. My mother-in-law (now) had the belief that once a gambler, always a gambler, and that I could not offer her daughter anything. We seperated as well due to her parents interference for about 5 months. The good news is my partner and I have been together 14 years (started dating at 20 yrs old), married, child etc. The bad news was me and her mother never got on for years - we didn't speak for 7 years, but my wife always maintained her faith in me - and that was all that was important to me. Funnily enough the parents are trying to make amends for how abysmally they treated me without getting to know me - even though it is probably a decade too late. I am a professional, good father and a nice person, but I always was - they just didn't want to see it.
I did try to let them get to know me in the past, but they didn't want to, just wanted to undermine me, so I did what was right for me - that was concentrate on me and my partner, and we did just fine. I made my wife know I beared them no ill will, and she should continue her relationship with them, but as they didn't want one with me, I couldn't do much else. You can only do so much yourself - the other party has to be willing to meet half way as well.Advice about gf's mom?
Stand up for her! that's what i say! show her mom that you care for her and it's just rude of her to do that!
Wow, I'm a mom and my daughter is 19 yrs old. I also have a 23 yr old son. Now, take that into the equation when I say what I'm about to say.
My son was also into drugs and alcohol as a teen and getting into trouble. He was really going down the wrong road and then he turned his life around. Married now and has 3 kids, just got a promotion and I'm very proud of him. He lived with his father when he was in trouble as a teen.
My daughter has two babies (19 months and 9 months) the father of the babies is not around but we do know he has to go to court again for breaking in and trespassing and may go to the slammer for at least a year. He doesn't pay for the babies at all. He is hard into drugs and alcohol says he is a changed man because he goes to AA meetings.Please, he got kicked out of a high class rehab that was given to him ($7500 gift)for taking a pill his own sister brought him. As for my daughter, she works full time and is going to school part time and I watch the kids.
Ok, I've been a teen mentor for many many years and I see that you probably have fallen back and forth a couple of times before you decided what it is in life you want. Am I right? Now you are definitely on the right path but have to convince mom that you have straightened up. Give mom a chance to realize just how you have changed. Don't go out of your way to please her (red flag) just go about your business. She will come around but it will take some time. Don't expect her to believe your word right away.
just go over and talk directly to the mom. even invite her to come to your church one sunday.show her that you are a changed man and that you really love and respect her daughter.
why don't you call up her mom and suggest a dinner together with just you and the mom so you can tell her all this. if her mom refuses, then just explain it on the phone and tell her you really want to see her daughter and you will treat her well.
her mom is just scared that your going to get her daughter into that stuff, or that you will hurt her. once you get the mom to believe that you have given all the bad stuff up, she will start liking you more and more.
good luck, and i know how tough moms can be, so keep trying till it happens.
well i know you probably don't want to do this but you are going to have to ';kiss-***'; for a while to her mom. like complement her tell her mom something funny. even bake a cake (or go buy one) and give it to her. after ';kissing-***'; to her mom for a while like 3 months if anything then things should start to be good. even invite your gf and her mom to go to church with you once in a while.
good luck! and i hope things work out. =D
well...there are two things that i can think of
1) have your girlfriend talk to her and ask her if she can start over new with you and go to dinner and stuff and show her that you arent the person she thinks you are
2) you could write her a letter or something explaining how you feel
good luck!
you aren't dating her mom your dating her, and if your gf really likes you she will tell her mom to back off.
Take g f and her Mom to church with you. Maybe she will learn to be a little more forgiving. If you are clean and sober as you say, that is super! It may take some time for Mom to accept you. After all, she is scared to death that you might relapse and get her daughter hooked on drugs. I'm telling you that this is a terrifying possibility to her and two years seems like an eternity to you. For her Mom, it is still not enough time to be sure that your sobriety will last. It may always be an issue ! I have seen people go back to it after they had been clean for years. So, son, whether you like it or not, you are an iffy prospect for a boyfriend. If you can manage , talk to her mom and tell her you understand her concerns. Promise her and yourself you will not live together or marry for 5 more years of sobriety. Then you will have a good chance. Good luck!
Well, I would suggest sitting down with the mom and finding out just exactly she has against you. Then you can tell her yourself how you've changed. Let her know that you realize that you were a screw up in the past, but you have changed for the better. I know it isn't as easy as it sounds, but facing the one you have the problem with is the best way to resolve the problem
the fact that you describe her as ';bitchy'; says that you're probably not as respectful to her as you think you are.
You've got to understand that this her MOM she has a right to be concerned about your past.
All you can do is prove to her you are a different person now through your ACTIONS not what you say. So prove to her that you are who you say you are.
It is a tough one. I was in a similar situation, where I was a compulsive gambler. My mother-in-law (now) had the belief that once a gambler, always a gambler, and that I could not offer her daughter anything. We seperated as well due to her parents interference for about 5 months. The good news is my partner and I have been together 14 years (started dating at 20 yrs old), married, child etc. The bad news was me and her mother never got on for years - we didn't speak for 7 years, but my wife always maintained her faith in me - and that was all that was important to me. Funnily enough the parents are trying to make amends for how abysmally they treated me without getting to know me - even though it is probably a decade too late. I am a professional, good father and a nice person, but I always was - they just didn't want to see it.
I did try to let them get to know me in the past, but they didn't want to, just wanted to undermine me, so I did what was right for me - that was concentrate on me and my partner, and we did just fine. I made my wife know I beared them no ill will, and she should continue her relationship with them, but as they didn't want one with me, I couldn't do much else. You can only do so much yourself - the other party has to be willing to meet half way as well.Advice about gf's mom?
Stand up for her! that's what i say! show her mom that you care for her and it's just rude of her to do that!
Wow, I'm a mom and my daughter is 19 yrs old. I also have a 23 yr old son. Now, take that into the equation when I say what I'm about to say.
My son was also into drugs and alcohol as a teen and getting into trouble. He was really going down the wrong road and then he turned his life around. Married now and has 3 kids, just got a promotion and I'm very proud of him. He lived with his father when he was in trouble as a teen.
My daughter has two babies (19 months and 9 months) the father of the babies is not around but we do know he has to go to court again for breaking in and trespassing and may go to the slammer for at least a year. He doesn't pay for the babies at all. He is hard into drugs and alcohol says he is a changed man because he goes to AA meetings.Please, he got kicked out of a high class rehab that was given to him ($7500 gift)for taking a pill his own sister brought him. As for my daughter, she works full time and is going to school part time and I watch the kids.
Ok, I've been a teen mentor for many many years and I see that you probably have fallen back and forth a couple of times before you decided what it is in life you want. Am I right? Now you are definitely on the right path but have to convince mom that you have straightened up. Give mom a chance to realize just how you have changed. Don't go out of your way to please her (red flag) just go about your business. She will come around but it will take some time. Don't expect her to believe your word right away.
just go over and talk directly to the mom. even invite her to come to your church one sunday.show her that you are a changed man and that you really love and respect her daughter.
why don't you call up her mom and suggest a dinner together with just you and the mom so you can tell her all this. if her mom refuses, then just explain it on the phone and tell her you really want to see her daughter and you will treat her well.
her mom is just scared that your going to get her daughter into that stuff, or that you will hurt her. once you get the mom to believe that you have given all the bad stuff up, she will start liking you more and more.
good luck, and i know how tough moms can be, so keep trying till it happens.
well i know you probably don't want to do this but you are going to have to ';kiss-***'; for a while to her mom. like complement her tell her mom something funny. even bake a cake (or go buy one) and give it to her. after ';kissing-***'; to her mom for a while like 3 months if anything then things should start to be good. even invite your gf and her mom to go to church with you once in a while.
good luck! and i hope things work out. =D
well...there are two things that i can think of
1) have your girlfriend talk to her and ask her if she can start over new with you and go to dinner and stuff and show her that you arent the person she thinks you are
2) you could write her a letter or something explaining how you feel
good luck!
you aren't dating her mom your dating her, and if your gf really likes you she will tell her mom to back off.
Take g f and her Mom to church with you. Maybe she will learn to be a little more forgiving. If you are clean and sober as you say, that is super! It may take some time for Mom to accept you. After all, she is scared to death that you might relapse and get her daughter hooked on drugs. I'm telling you that this is a terrifying possibility to her and two years seems like an eternity to you. For her Mom, it is still not enough time to be sure that your sobriety will last. It may always be an issue ! I have seen people go back to it after they had been clean for years. So, son, whether you like it or not, you are an iffy prospect for a boyfriend. If you can manage , talk to her mom and tell her you understand her concerns. Promise her and yourself you will not live together or marry for 5 more years of sobriety. Then you will have a good chance. Good luck!
Well, I would suggest sitting down with the mom and finding out just exactly she has against you. Then you can tell her yourself how you've changed. Let her know that you realize that you were a screw up in the past, but you have changed for the better. I know it isn't as easy as it sounds, but facing the one you have the problem with is the best way to resolve the problem
the fact that you describe her as ';bitchy'; says that you're probably not as respectful to her as you think you are.
You've got to understand that this her MOM she has a right to be concerned about your past.
All you can do is prove to her you are a different person now through your ACTIONS not what you say. So prove to her that you are who you say you are.
Advice about a girl needed?
ok ill get strait to it, she is a girl that is way out of my leuge. as in shes a cheerleader, she is defintly beutiful, very popular...you get my point. she is only in 8th grade. im in 10th grade and am slightly chubby, i play football but im not exactly the best, and have mild acne that makes m very nervous everywhere i go. i have only talked to her once on a.i.m. and we had a decent convrsation...i wont ever have a chance to just walk up to her and talk so im gonna tal to her on aim more, i would like to get advice on what i could say to her on aim or how i should act...if anyone has ANY advice i would greatly appriciate it,thank youAdvice about a girl needed?
1. be yourself
2. see if there's something she needs ie help with a class you've taken before
3. be a friend--try to put aside how beautiful and popular she is and get to know her personality--she will definitely pick up on that and appreciate it. If she's a great person then you'll have a great friend. If not, you'll know to back off.
4. Take it slow. The school year seems to rush on by but good things take time. She's in the eighth grade and probably lives in your area. If she's all that, she's worth taking the time to get closer to.
5. Don't lose sight of all the other cool girls that you could be hanging out with. Don't focus all your attentions on this one girl. There might be someone really great who's waiting for you to notice her. She's not going to come right up to you at lunch and start a conversation but she's going to stand right where you can see her.
All the things you've mentioned are mutable
cheerleaders sometimes drop out of the squad because they are overworked
football players sometimes get hurt (although I hope that doesn't happen to you).
Also once you're out of highschool, being on the football team or being a cheerleader doesn't matter that much any more. But having a great friendship that maybe became something more is a really beautiful thing.
Good LuckAdvice about a girl needed?
try to get a girl thats in ur league
You are worried way to much about the way you look, when the right girl comes along she won't care about what you look like but will look past it and see the real you inside and besides most of the time we look better then what we think we do so you probably aren't that bad. Just take a chance and start talking to her give her a compliment. Good luck
isnt there a saying thats like ';you need to love yourself, before loving others'; ..something like that...
what i mean is, maybe you should take it slow with her for a while and then start talking more with her once you are more comfortable and secure with yourself.
whatever you do, dont blurt your feelings out too fast, be her friend first.
You are in 10th grade so that gives you some advantage.
It sounds like you've really built this girl up in your mind to be some kind of untouchable God-like figure.
She's a cheerleader and pretty, so you assume that she's out of your league. As a man of 44, I've learned that the quickest way to solve any problem is to first get the facts.
You won't be able to get the facts talking to her through aim.
You can save yourself a LOT of time and emotional energy by doing the thing that most terrifies you and that is getting yourself in a position where you will be around her.
Whether it's at lunch or walking down the hallway at school.
You need to look her in the eye and say 'Hello' and see if she says 'Hello' back. That's it. Just say 'hello'.
That should be your goal.
The way that she responds to your 'hello' will tell you TONS of data about her and her thoughts about you.
If she wants to talk more to you, it's a good sign.
You can mention that you enjoyed the talk you shared with her on aim recently.
You see my friend, if it is your goal to have her as your girlfriend, you're gonna have to practice talking to her in-person.
It's possible that she already likes you and is waiting for you to ask her out.
Walk tall and employ good posture as you walk near her.
One more thing; she may be pretty and popular, but she is a person with feelings about stuff. There are things about her looks that she doesn't like.
Okay, final bit of advice:
Once she's your girlfriend, find out what her dreams %26amp; goals are in life and help her to achieve them.
If she likes art, for example, take her to the art museum for a date. Show interest in what's important to her.
You don't have to lie to her and say that you like art if you really don't. She will appreciate that you are interested in her being happy. She will feel really loved and supported by your gesture.
Good luck!
Just say what comes to your mind. If you have talked to her online, she probably wouldn't care about how fat or how much acne you have. So what if she's a cheerleader. My sister's a cheerleader and she's the same like me. Be confident and say what's on your mind. Who cares about acne? Be a man. You can ask her online or face to face. Act like you do to your friends. She will probably understand and say yes right away. Be brave and give it a shot. Good luck!!!
First of all why do you think she is out of your league? Just remember to a female, looks are something but its not EVERYTHING. You can be unattractive but if you have the right personality, it will make her attracted to you.
You have to show her that you have personality. Don't be so serious, try to make her laugh and at the same time get to know her a little better by asking her questions about herself. Remember to let her do most of the talking and you do most of the listening. The only thing you do is ask her questions, so of like a interview. She will give you ';hints'; on what to talk about. All you have to do is listen.
Well, if you don't know her that well, it seems like you're just interested because she's beautiful. If you talk about your likes and dislikes, morals in life, all that jazz.. then you at least have a genuine liking for her, and that's a good start.
well
if u like her
get to know her more
but
u should definitely talk to her in person
get to know her hobbies...what does she like or dislike
get some pro-active or face cream to help out the acne
be urself
thats how to get to a girls heart.....dont act like someone else
I would just act yourself and try to become her friend. Once yall have talked alot and become better friends it might seem easier to let her know how you feel about her.
i think you should tell her in person, but if you insisit on telling her over the computer, i think you should be urself, and stop doubting your possibilities. tell her how you fel (which you already are) but say it with confidence. you never know, maybe she sees you as someone who she would like to be with. don't ever doubt yourself, and thin about that while your telling her.
just ask her questions about herself, and what shes up to in school. make sure to tell her about yourself too, to avoid looking creepy. She prolly likes talking to you just because its fun to know that a person 2 grades older than you is interested in talking to you. good luck with her, just be yourself :)
Populr w h o r e, congratulation. Maybe you should look at real women? Move out of country for that.
Don't date an 8th grade girl. She is in middle school, you are in high school. Seriously, you're a football player, so I bet you could find a 9th, 10th, or 11th grade girl who would date you somewhere in the world besides a little 8th grader. :D Anyway, if you did date her, it could give her bad ideas for later on in life...do you want her dating 30-year-olds when she's in 11th grade or something? Then I suggest you stay away.
1. be yourself
2. see if there's something she needs ie help with a class you've taken before
3. be a friend--try to put aside how beautiful and popular she is and get to know her personality--she will definitely pick up on that and appreciate it. If she's a great person then you'll have a great friend. If not, you'll know to back off.
4. Take it slow. The school year seems to rush on by but good things take time. She's in the eighth grade and probably lives in your area. If she's all that, she's worth taking the time to get closer to.
5. Don't lose sight of all the other cool girls that you could be hanging out with. Don't focus all your attentions on this one girl. There might be someone really great who's waiting for you to notice her. She's not going to come right up to you at lunch and start a conversation but she's going to stand right where you can see her.
All the things you've mentioned are mutable
cheerleaders sometimes drop out of the squad because they are overworked
football players sometimes get hurt (although I hope that doesn't happen to you).
Also once you're out of highschool, being on the football team or being a cheerleader doesn't matter that much any more. But having a great friendship that maybe became something more is a really beautiful thing.
Good LuckAdvice about a girl needed?
try to get a girl thats in ur league
You are worried way to much about the way you look, when the right girl comes along she won't care about what you look like but will look past it and see the real you inside and besides most of the time we look better then what we think we do so you probably aren't that bad. Just take a chance and start talking to her give her a compliment. Good luck
isnt there a saying thats like ';you need to love yourself, before loving others'; ..something like that...
what i mean is, maybe you should take it slow with her for a while and then start talking more with her once you are more comfortable and secure with yourself.
whatever you do, dont blurt your feelings out too fast, be her friend first.
You are in 10th grade so that gives you some advantage.
It sounds like you've really built this girl up in your mind to be some kind of untouchable God-like figure.
She's a cheerleader and pretty, so you assume that she's out of your league. As a man of 44, I've learned that the quickest way to solve any problem is to first get the facts.
You won't be able to get the facts talking to her through aim.
You can save yourself a LOT of time and emotional energy by doing the thing that most terrifies you and that is getting yourself in a position where you will be around her.
Whether it's at lunch or walking down the hallway at school.
You need to look her in the eye and say 'Hello' and see if she says 'Hello' back. That's it. Just say 'hello'.
That should be your goal.
The way that she responds to your 'hello' will tell you TONS of data about her and her thoughts about you.
If she wants to talk more to you, it's a good sign.
You can mention that you enjoyed the talk you shared with her on aim recently.
You see my friend, if it is your goal to have her as your girlfriend, you're gonna have to practice talking to her in-person.
It's possible that she already likes you and is waiting for you to ask her out.
Walk tall and employ good posture as you walk near her.
One more thing; she may be pretty and popular, but she is a person with feelings about stuff. There are things about her looks that she doesn't like.
Okay, final bit of advice:
Once she's your girlfriend, find out what her dreams %26amp; goals are in life and help her to achieve them.
If she likes art, for example, take her to the art museum for a date. Show interest in what's important to her.
You don't have to lie to her and say that you like art if you really don't. She will appreciate that you are interested in her being happy. She will feel really loved and supported by your gesture.
Good luck!
Just say what comes to your mind. If you have talked to her online, she probably wouldn't care about how fat or how much acne you have. So what if she's a cheerleader. My sister's a cheerleader and she's the same like me. Be confident and say what's on your mind. Who cares about acne? Be a man. You can ask her online or face to face. Act like you do to your friends. She will probably understand and say yes right away. Be brave and give it a shot. Good luck!!!
First of all why do you think she is out of your league? Just remember to a female, looks are something but its not EVERYTHING. You can be unattractive but if you have the right personality, it will make her attracted to you.
You have to show her that you have personality. Don't be so serious, try to make her laugh and at the same time get to know her a little better by asking her questions about herself. Remember to let her do most of the talking and you do most of the listening. The only thing you do is ask her questions, so of like a interview. She will give you ';hints'; on what to talk about. All you have to do is listen.
Well, if you don't know her that well, it seems like you're just interested because she's beautiful. If you talk about your likes and dislikes, morals in life, all that jazz.. then you at least have a genuine liking for her, and that's a good start.
well
if u like her
get to know her more
but
u should definitely talk to her in person
get to know her hobbies...what does she like or dislike
get some pro-active or face cream to help out the acne
be urself
thats how to get to a girls heart.....dont act like someone else
I would just act yourself and try to become her friend. Once yall have talked alot and become better friends it might seem easier to let her know how you feel about her.
i think you should tell her in person, but if you insisit on telling her over the computer, i think you should be urself, and stop doubting your possibilities. tell her how you fel (which you already are) but say it with confidence. you never know, maybe she sees you as someone who she would like to be with. don't ever doubt yourself, and thin about that while your telling her.
just ask her questions about herself, and what shes up to in school. make sure to tell her about yourself too, to avoid looking creepy. She prolly likes talking to you just because its fun to know that a person 2 grades older than you is interested in talking to you. good luck with her, just be yourself :)
Populr w h o r e, congratulation. Maybe you should look at real women? Move out of country for that.
Don't date an 8th grade girl. She is in middle school, you are in high school. Seriously, you're a football player, so I bet you could find a 9th, 10th, or 11th grade girl who would date you somewhere in the world besides a little 8th grader. :D Anyway, if you did date her, it could give her bad ideas for later on in life...do you want her dating 30-year-olds when she's in 11th grade or something? Then I suggest you stay away.
Advice about an Ex Boyfriend!!!?
Alright I have this ex boyfriend I dated last yr.. we dated for a few months.. and we were sleepin w/ eachother and what not... than we broke up and became friends.. but we were friends that slept with eachother.. unless one of us was in a realtionship.. well i guess when i was.. because i broke up w/ a guy and my and my friend (ex) chilled and we were talkin about what happened and we kicked it! and he has a girlfriend... and 2 nights ago he came to see me and we went all the way.. and talked about alot of ****.. except his girlfriend.. what should i do...Advice about an Ex Boyfriend!!!?
if he cheats on her, he will cheat on youAdvice about an Ex Boyfriend!!!?
';but we were friends that slept with each other.. unless one of us was in a relationship'; .......well you have now officially become his ';extra piece on the side no matter what';. he's never going to think anything of you now and quite frankly, you shouldn't think anything of him. there is no need to talk about the GF now. you already slept with her man. your karma bill will be arriving shortly.
i hope you all are wearing condoms to avoid making babies nobody wants or spreading diseases with all of this creeping going on.
if he cheats on her, he will cheat on youAdvice about an Ex Boyfriend!!!?
';but we were friends that slept with each other.. unless one of us was in a relationship'; .......well you have now officially become his ';extra piece on the side no matter what';. he's never going to think anything of you now and quite frankly, you shouldn't think anything of him. there is no need to talk about the GF now. you already slept with her man. your karma bill will be arriving shortly.
i hope you all are wearing condoms to avoid making babies nobody wants or spreading diseases with all of this creeping going on.
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