Thursday, August 19, 2010

I need some more advice about my fiance, please, I'm starting to feel lost & confused, please help.?

Ok, i have told him how i felt and he still acts the same. when we first got together he had passion, heat, lustful thoughts, and he found me irresistible, but now he doesn't act like he use to. What should i do? i mean yeah he works, but he was workin when we first started going out. He says he trusts me, but he doesn't act like it. He never wants to take me out anymore, i am so lost and confused. We'll be together a year on Thanksgiving Day, and i don't think he plans on doing anything for me. Someone please help.


Signed lost and confused.


p.s. I dont want anyone else. i only want him, and i constantly tell him that, but i dont think he listens. sometimes i wonder if he takes my love for granted. Because he knows my biggest fear is living life without him.I need some more advice about my fiance, please, I'm starting to feel lost %26amp; confused, please help.?
That was your first mistake letting him know you fear living life without him. Of course he takes you for granted now he knows he's got you right where he wants you. Under his complete control because he knows you'll never leave him so he doesn't have to try to keep you interested and happy. You think he would have at least waited until you were married to act like he is. Like a lot a men do but he is showing you now what life with him is going to be like. You made it not any fun for him anymore.I need some more advice about my fiance, please, I'm starting to feel lost %26amp; confused, please help.?
Not trying to hurt your feelings, but you may be showing too much drama. It's okay sometimes, but too much can push someone away. Try easing up and relaxing, a little more easy going attitude may go a long way. People do change as the relationship progresses, don't expect anyone to stay the same way as they did at first...it's unobtainable. Not to say that you shouldn't be happy, that should be his priority. If it's not, try working on why that is and if he understands how you feel. Try just having an honest conversation with him as a person...don't say ';you can't live without him'; and crap like that...just talk as a person would talk to any other person. Tell him that you need to know that you are his priority...just make sure your expectations are real and not selfish...me, me, me.....
get used to it...you will go through phases. it will be ok. it usually happens about once a year and how long it last differs.try spicing things up a lil to speed up the process
O.K. First off, its always all love and passion in the beggining, and you want to spend every moment together, romance blah, blah, blah. Now into reality. After being together a long time, you should feel comfortable and secure. You can't expect everyday to be like it was in the beggining, after you have been with someone a long time, things change. I am not saying that the love isn't there, but you can't really expect him to have 'relationship disscussions' and kid disscusions everyday. Maybe he is comfortable knowing he wants to be with you, love you, have a family with you, but real life isn't a romance novel, and that stuff just doesn't happen everyday. You will push him away if you constantly bug for romance and stuff. Just enjoy your everyday life together, enjoy each others company. In a true long term relationship and marriage, you go through phases, sometimes its all la la land and in love, then its like you are best friends, sometimes you will mad at eachother, and it goes back and forth. Look at people who have been married for a long time, do you think they are at home staring into eachothers eyes, telling eachother how much they mean to eachother and all the cheesy stuff. lol Probly not on a daily basis. Try and relax, give him a little room. Maybe he will open up a little more if you back off him a bit. Its hard to want to do or say special things to someone when it feels like a demand. Sounds like he is just comfortable in the relationship, just tell him you need a little romance once in a while, and then leave it alone. Just enjoy today, he will come around, and the moments will be that much more special, because he will do it on his own, and you will know its from the heart, and not from you pushing.
WHOAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA, BACK UP GIRL, YOUR SCARIN' ME CAN'T IMAGINE WHAT YOUR DOIN; TO YOUR BF. RELAX IT'S ONLY BEEN A YEAR, ENJOY EACH OTHER, IF YOU GO AT HIM ANYTHING LIKE YOUR QUESTION.HE'S GONNA BAIL, AND HE'D BE RIGHT! SLOW DOWN!!!!!!!!!!

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