My daughter has just had a beautiful wee girl. of course i am over the moon. My concern is :My daughters husband already has a wee boy who is five and lives part of the week with them. The rest of the time he spends with his mum and grandma.
This child has every toy and designer clothes imaginable and i am unsure what to do when buying for the new baby.
I want to treat them the same but generally i wouldnt buy my step grand son as much as he already has two sets of grandparetns who buy lots for him.
How should i manage this? It puts me off buying my grand daughter things. For example i saw a lovely wee dress today but was wary of buying it.
At Xmas and birthdays should i buy them the same? even though my grandson is getting from his mum and grandparents on her side?
I so dont want to upset my son in law either.
Help - how do you manage these things?
Many thanksNeed advice about being a new grannie!?
Congratulations ! If this is YOUR first then go all out for this new grand daughter, you are not doing any harm, but when it happened to me I bought the other ones a little gift not to make then feel left out of it. After that I spent the same amount of money on them all. After all its not the kiddies fault they are in this situation. Enjoy being a Grandma. Another thing is that this baby is also his little sister and you don't want him to be jealous and cause any problems, do you, and Grannies are supposed to be the BEST arent they.Need advice about being a new grannie!?
Its your first grand baby! Spoil her to your hearts content! As you said he already has two sets of grandparents tat spoil him so you do not need to feel guilty for anything. I just gave my Mom her first grand baby last year and I have a 13 year old step son. She still gets him Christmas and b-day gifts but spoils my daughter rotten and loves every minute of it. Enjoy your new love and congratulations.
I am in a similar situation except my step grandson lives full time with my son %26amp; daughter in law. I spend exactly the same amount of money on them for birthdays and christmas but if I see something for my granddaughter I buy it and buy a gift for my step grandson but not always of the same value.
Well, honestly, it doesn't sound like you are a new grandmother. You have been a grandmother for as long as your daughter and son in law have been married!!! The little boy is your grandson too. Treat them both the same. Just come out and ask your son-in-law what the little boy needs/wants for birthdays, christmas, etc.... Spending time can be just as special as gifts.
Be fair and communicate. It should be fun and happy, Gifts should not be a Competition if you don't make is one you should be fine.
Just tell your daughter how you feel about it and see if she has anything to say tyhat might you in your situation. If not, you could talk to your son-in-law ???
I think it's ok to treat the kids differently IF you clear it with the parents, first. Some people flip out about this (there's a woman on Y!A who's completely crazy about it) so you have to feel out the parents. When the kids are little, they should both get a gift, even if the older one only gets a candy bar. Just talk it out.
Congrats on becoming a granny , Its great isn't it.
Anyways if I were you I would just keep things equal between the 2 kids , I know in your heart of hearts there will be a very special part for your wee grand daughter but you have to make sure they always feel the same anything different will only cause sibling rivalry. I don't think you have to go and spend tons to make them happy let everyone else do that if that's what they like to do, kids don`t know any better at this age and should be tought to appreciate even the smallest of gestures and good intent right? The best advice is to keep an equal balance between both children. So if you see a dress you want for your wee girl then by all means give it but make sure you have something in the other hand for the wee boy as well. That way everyones happy including parents.
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